1. |
Vacant
01:57
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2. |
Recovery
03:14
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I'm biting the bullet, I'm taking the pills
You sold me lies to make room for others,
You're cutting ties, you're closing shutters
Purposely, burning bridges that I've been living under
I will never fail myself
I can stand without your help
Lately I've been thinking, how you jumped ship, just as it was on the brink of sinking.
Luckily I saved myself
From day one, I should've known not to call you home
Keep your sorrows, to yourself
You're a lost connection, your personality reflects all my actions of neglect
What I despise, are your hidden lies that call out for my attention
I am the sound of the shipwreck
You are the calm before the storm
I am the sound of the shipwreck
Your water's cold, there is no hope
I am the sound of the shipwreck
Your pain's relentless waves have kept me torn
I have been broken, I have been molded, this is who I've become
There are no wasted breaths, there's only regret to remind me of what you've done
So take a step back, back to a broken past, you were always just a shade of grey
From now on, I walk my own fucking path while you're reminded of better days
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3. |
Longevity
02:38
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With my feet firmly on the ground, I'll cast aside the path that you chose so blindly
Your future's happiness is falsely reinsured
I might just have these words, but at least they have a meaning
I refuse to fall short of the life I want to live
I'll cast aside this pointless life defined by boundaries and willingly let go of all those who confine me
And I will live my life step by step and day by day
Until I've made my mark and let the seas part to carry me away
I'll take my chance on the road less traveled,
And give up everything I have and expect nothing in return
I will never ask for anything in return
And all my life, I've been searching for a deeper meaning to understand why I feel so cold
I have nothing left to prove to anyone, cuz I will never settle for less again
I never thought my life would be like this, the person that I've grown to be, cannot be dismissed
As I sunk to the bottom, I was expected to choke
I've got blood from the blisters from climbing the rope
I never thought my life would be like this, the person that I've grown to be, cannot be dismissed
And I refuse to let anyone get the best of me again
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4. |
Time
02:09
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Watching my days rot away, every moment wasted
My time on this earth has faded away from me
Substances of self affliction, my addiction's left me torn and sore
Give up this life of strife and go home where your bed is warm
Choking on that smoke, no memories of nights before
I can't stop this happiness, this artificial feel
It's all I have to forget the moment, hiding from what's real
Successful friends, I'll never make amends with everything I'm not
I'd rather lie in bed and let smoke fill my head, vacancy is all I've got
Before Father Time's hands decide to put wrinkles on my face
I hope to know my place, I hope to know my fucking place
Vacant thoughts and wasted time
Eternal sunshine to a spotless mind
You've got the drugs I'll commit the crime
Eternal sunshine to a spotless mind
Artificial, always alone, always hungry and never home
I've giving so much faith to strangers and the streets, each drug I choose to take, I lose a part of me
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5. |
Nova
02:23
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The ghost of you
I swear it's all I ever see
The haunting silhouettes of your two faces carry on with me
The thoughts of you discrete a subtle, follow me to sleep
The constant apparition of your name won't let me be
The ghost of you
Still lingers in my sheets
The smell of home to me is you
This dormant pain I buried underneath
It's rising, and it's washing back to shore
Those haunting eyes I feel deprived, of the life I had before
Just let go
I think about you more than I admit
Just let go
I am a fucking addict, I can't quit
And now everything we worked for, slowly set a drift
We have nothing left to show for it, theres nothing left to show
You let me drown at sea
Couldn't you hear me calling?
Waves crashed around my feet
Your name I barley could breathe
Deceived, I should keep it buried deep in the confines of me
I'm forced to steer this one man ship, still searching for my home
With each gust of wind my direction shifts
When I left for the unknown
Everyday I wake with the sun
You've loaded the bullets but I've got the gun
Accepting the fact that it wont be the same, when I embraced your love in the purest of ways
But where are you now?
But where are you now?
It was all for nothing
But where are you now?
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6. |
Interlude
01:13
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To the son I'll never know:
There's not a day that passes that I don't think about you
There's not a day that I don't regret, the decisions I had to make
But I can only hope that you're looking down at me from the skies, smiling
Because of the person you made me
I will not be bitter
I am a better person because of the mistakes that I have made
I will not be bitter
I am a better person because of the mistakes that I have made
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7. |
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If you could only know, the built regret that's choking my neck, with every passing day I made the choice to let you go
Oh god forgive me
And to my bastard of a son, can you forgive me too?
Just try to understand the mistakes of your father had nothing to do with you
And soon some day I'll come to terms with my ways
Son, I'll make you proud, you deserved the chance I know that now
You gave me new breath to let in, another forsaken angel rushed too quickly to heaven
I wish I knew your face, and the warmth of your skin
A ghost is all I embrace, a hollow body begins
These fucking words can never justify a thing
Just know I love you and that wont ever change.
Ill be just fine, If you promise to be okay too
Just take your time, how could I think I'd never need you?
Watching me grow, when it's all said and done
I hope that you know:
You'll always be my son
The cold murder of my own blood
The nights I lie awake wishing that he wasn't gone
A path forsaken, before he even had his chance
Too young to understand the mistakes of a man.
Trying everyday, forgetting the ghost that carry on my mistakes
Would you forgive me if you had the chance?
Could you believe me if I said id take it back?
I will not be bitter, I am better person because of the mistakes I made
Trying everyday, forgetting the ghost that carry on my mistakes
Would you forgive me if you had the chance?
Could you believe me if I said I'd take it back?
And I understand that no amount of tears I shed can bring you back, but I will not be bitter
I am a better person because of the mistakes I've made
And I can only hope that you're looking down at me from the skies, smiling because of the person you made me.
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PCMKR San Jose, California
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